Quotes, Quotations and Sayings

Genius is pain.

Woman is the Nigger of the World.

I never listen to the radio. If it's bad, I make fun of it, and if it's good, I get jealous that I didn't think of it.

Who dares to teach must never cease to learn John Cotton Dana

If you were in a room with Kadaffi, Saddam Hussien, and John Sununu, and you only had two bullets, what would you do. Shoot John Sununu twice.

John Johnson Now this is something the other tour guides won't tell you. In this particular cell-block, Machine Gun Kelly had what we call in the prison system, a bitch. And one night in a jealous rage Kelly took a make-shift knife or shiv, and cut out the bitch's eyes. And as if this wasn't enough retribution for Kelly, the next day he and four other inmates took turns pissing into the bitch's ocular cavities. (short pause) This way to the cafeteria

Being on tour sends me crazy, I drink too much and out comes the John Mcenroe in me.

Despite everybody who has been born and has died, the world has just gone on. I mean, look at Napoleon --but we went right on. Look at Harpo Marx --the world went around, it didn't stop for a second. It's sad but true. John Kennedy, right?

Time you enjoy wasting is not wasted.

God is a concept by which we measure our pain.

I feel like the fellow in jail who is watching his scaffold being built. (On construction of reviewing stands for inauguration of his successor John F Kennedy)

John: "Mabye you should stop taking the paint off that and take a break" Brian: "The big purple cow standing on the neon clown told me I can't!

It was a great ride up here. We're really happy to see Sergei and John.

He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love. [I John]

I don't care too much for money, money can't buy me love.

John: "What day was it, Grandma?" Grandma Alice: "Oh you know, it was the other day before yesterday after tommorow.

Johnson's First Law: When any mechanical contrivance fails, it will do so at the most inconvenient possible time.

WHERE CAN THE MATTER BE Oh, dear, where can the matter be When it's converted to energy? There is a slight loss of parity. Johnny's so long at the fair.

This is my commandment, that ye love one another. [Jesus, In John 15:12]

Look my story has been a really happy one except for that comment from John Brogden, so let's not dwell on it.

What we think, or what we know, or what we believe is, in the end, of little consequence. The only consequence is what we do. -- John Ruskin

The two-party system has given this country the war of Lyndon Johnson, the Watergate of Nixon, and the incompetence of Carter. Saying we should keep the two-party system simply because it is working is like saying the Titanic voyage was a success because a few people survived on life-rafts.

Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans.

Trying to call my friend John after he got home from military school: "Is John there??" "Who the hell is this!!! You think this is funny?? Don't ever call back, you little punk!!!" Apparently john's old number was now Papa John's Pizza. Oops.

Life is what happens while you are making other plans.

-- Exclusive dedication to necessitious chores without interludes of hedonistic diversion renders John a hebetudinous fellow.

I'm not afraid of death because I don't believe in it. It's just getting out of one car, and into another.

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.

After [my father had] seen me in five or six things, he said, ''Son, your mother and I really enjoyed your recent film, and I must say that you're a lot like John Wayne.'' And I said, ''How so?'' And he said, ''Well, you're exactly the same in all your roles.'' Now, as a modern American actor, that's not what you want to hear. But for a guy who watched John Wayne movies and grew up in Iowa, it's a sterling compliment.

The fathers of the field had been pretty confusing: John von Neumann speculated about computers and the human brain in analogies sufficiently wild to be worthy of a medieval thinker, and Alan Turing thought about criteria to settle the question of whether machines can think, a question of which we now know that it is about as relevant as the question of whether submarines can swim.

Heller's Law: The first myth of management is that it exists. Johnson's Corollary: Nobody really knows what is going on anywhere within the organization.

We know that we have passed from death into life, because we love... [1 John 3:14]

We must uphold the promise of Roosevelt, Truman, Kennedy, Johnson, Carter, and Clinton and never allow the President and his Republican friends to threaten Social Security by putting it on the Wall Street trading block.

I've had the boyhood thing of being Elvis. Now I want to be with my best friend, and my best friend's my wife. Who could ask for anything more?

Let him who desires to see others happy, make haste to give while his gift can be enjoyed, and remember that every moment of delay takes away something from the value of his benefaction-Samuel Johnson

When I was 12, I used to think I was a genius and nobody had noticed. If there such a thing as a genius, I am one, and if there isn't, then I don't care.

Now this is eternal life: that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom thou has sent. [Jesus -- John 17:3]

Lots of people who complained about us receiving the MBE received theirs for heroism in the war --for killing people. We received ours for entertaining other people. I'd say we deserve ours more.

A few years back I was more a candidate for skid row bum than an Emmy. If I hadn't stopped [drinking], I'd be playing handball with John Belushi right now.

The improved American highway system isolated the American-in-transit. On his speedway he had no contact with the towns which he by-passed. If he stopped for food or gas, he was served no local fare or local fuel, but had one of Howard Johnson's nationally branded ice cream flavors, and so many gallons of Exxon. This vast ocean of superhighways was nearly as free of culture as the sea traversed by the Mayflower Pilgrims.

Christianity will go. It will vanish and shrink. I needn't argue with that; I'm right and I will be proved right. We're more popular than Jesus now; I don't know which will go first -- rock and roll or Christianity.

The more I see the less I know for sure.

What's nice about my dating life is that I don't have to leave my house. All I have to do is read the paper: I'm marrying Richard Gere, dating Daniel Day-Lewis, parading around with John F. Kennedy, Jr., and even Robert De Niro was in there for a day.

To John I owed great obligation; but John, unhappily, thought fit to publish it to all the nation: Sure John and I are more than quit.

People named John and Mary never divorce. For better or for worse, in madness and in saneness, they seem bound together for eternity by their rudimentary nomenclature. They may loathe and despise one another, quarrel, weep, and commit mayhem, but they are not free to divorce. Tom, Dick, and Harry can go to Reno on a whim, but nothing short of death can separate John and Mary.

The worst drugs are as bad as anybody's told you. It's just a dumb trip, which I can't condemn people if they get into it, because one gets into it for one's own personal, social, emotional reasons. It's something to be avoided if one can help it.

The basic thing nobody asks is why do people take drugs of any sort? Why do we have these accessories to normal living to live? I mean, is there something wrong with society that's making us so pressurized, that we cannot live without guarding ourselves against it?

If being an egomaniac means I believe in what I do and in my art or my music, then in that respect you can call me that I believe in what I do, and I'll say it.

You have to be a bastard to make it, and that's a fact. And the Beatles are the biggest bastards on earth.

There, but for the grace of God, goes John Bradford.